I am not afraid of being (also) weak

I am not afraid of being (also) weak

Confusion and disorientation. Just like living in a never ending limbo.
Just like feeling the need of always being a strong woman. A woman who doesn’t care about anything, a woman who stands any situation. A woman who never breaks.
Because women can’t break. We can’t look weak. Men like strong souls, just like them. They are attracted to those who seem to be invincible and who never struggle. But I am tired of their expectations. I love feelings like nostalgia and melancholy. I love loneliness and yes, I also love weakness.

“You have been vulnerable, people may change their opinion about you”.
Are you talking seriously?

“I have showed my weakness and if somebody changes their mind because of this, well they are not the right person for me”.

I am also a weak person. I am a very strong woman but I am still a human being. We all are, for God’s Sake, but we feel so scared of showing our weakness. We try to appear insensitive just to protect our soul.

And the result of this experiment is an endless feeling of cynicism.
Cynicism is a shell. It is a overdose of selfishness boosted by social media. It is a place that forces us to appear strong, unbeatable, and cellulite-free.
Men may think: “I like strong women. I like her, but there might be other strong women around. I better keep an eye (always) open”

Women may think: “I need to look strong, beautiful, and wild. I need to feel confident – social media boost our ego so badly”.

Here we are again.
I want to find someone who can actually appreciate my weaknesses, otherwise I will keep living in my soap bubble – I always find the way to snuggle someone in without blowing it up.
You must be crazy to let it blow. But maybe if we did blow our bubble-shell, we would find our real self.
I stay in that bubble and I try to connect with myself. And every day I discover a little bit more about who I really am.
I find beauty in my weakness and in my strength.
I always manage to find myself, even when I am disoriented.